In pre-revolutionary Russia, unlike modern Russia, satirical literature had a leading position. The stories by Saltykov-Shchedrin on their own are worth a lot. The literary works of the great wordsmith harbor so much humor and comedy. Although, it should be admitted that the recent events that happened to the ‘characters’ of one of the military units of Russia in terms of grotesqueness surpassed even the plot about the travesty characters of the Glupov city…

So, in November 2020, the Ministry of Defense of the Russian Federation officially investigated the case of Colonel Vyazovsky Roman Yurevich, the commander of military unit 66431 (military base 4), sleeping during a secure video conference (hereinafter referred to as SVC), conducted by the Minister of Defense Sergei Shoigu. The official proceedings were carried out by Colonel Lukyanenko A. Yu., the deputy commander of military unit 47084 for military and political work.

Reader discretion is advised (especially for those being the faint of heart and children) since below is the full text of the proceedings. Spelling, punctuation and abbreviations of the author are preserved.

On November 3, 2020, from 11.00 am to 1.00 pm in the SVC mode, a conference call was facilitated by the Minister of Defense of the Russian Federation, General of the Army Shoigu S.K. The SVC was attended by the leaders (chiefs) of the central bodies of military command, the commanders of the formations, the commanders of the military bases.

At around 11.30 am to the operational duty officer of the command post of military unit 66431, captain A. S. Divel, the liaison officer of the National Defense Management Center of Russian Federation (hereinafter – NDMC RF), phoned and brought the information that Colonel Vyazovsky R.Yu. sleeps during the SVC.

According to the screenshot provided to the NDMC RF, it appears that the eyelids of Colonel Vyazovsky R. Yu. were lowered down, while Colonel Vyazovsky R. Yu. claims that at that moment he was not sleeping but writing down the information communicated by the SVC head.

This information is indirectly confirmed by the fact that in the screenshot provided to the NDMC RF, the commander of 49 A, the commander of the KNB, the commander of 7 MB and 22 AC were making the entries in the workbooks with their eyes being also downcast.
The reason for the incident was the following:

the SVC system quality imperfection (the image periodically freezed, and if a serviceman blinked at the moment, it might seem that the serviceman was asleep), which does not allow a high degree of detail to confirm that the subscriber is in a state of sleep.
Based on the abovestated, in order to prevent similar cases in the future, I SUGGEST:

1. By November 9, 2020, bring this case to the attention of the commanders of the formation of the military units of the association.
2. Prohibit lowering one’s eyes for more than 5 seconds while writing down.

In conclusion, I would like to mention the thesis of one literary critic:

“Until nowadays, the city of Glupov remains the past, present and future of Russia.”

Therefore, in honor of the brilliant Russian writer Saltykov-Shchedrin, this article opens a new rubric entitled “News from Glupov” on the Quaestio Principialis resource.

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